Category Archives: details

Point of View Problems (Blog 1 of Several)

by
Charlotte Firbank-King

If you ever wonder if you’re using point of view (POV) correctly, put yourself in the character’s head and ask yourself if you can see what you implied the character can see. For example, you can’t see colour creep into your cheeks, but you can feel the heat of a blush. You can’t see yourself paling, but you can feel blood drain from your face. In short, always go into your character’s head. One can use mirrors, windows, or any reflective surface to see the character’s image and explain it.

Example A:

Nathan’s wife coughed and he hastily wiped a spot of blood from her lips, trying to hide the evidence. But she saw it and, for the first time, fear flickered in her eyes. Unable to bear seeing her pain and now fear, he dragged himself from her deathbed and leaned on her dresser, then lifted his head and stared at his image in an ornate mirror. Dark shadows underscored his sunken eyes, and deep lines drew his wide mouth down. He tried to smooth his tousled black hair. He was strong, but was he strong enough to bear losing her? In reality, what use was his immense size and strength in the face of death? 

There you have it all—how he feels, where he is, and how he looks. However, don’t overuse this ploy. Have another character tell you what the reader wants to know, like in this second example.


Example B:

She coughed and tried to wipe her mouth. Nathan leaned over and gently wiped her lips. She caught sight of a crimson stain of blood on the handkerchief that he tried so hard to hide. For the first time, fear rippled through her. So this was the end. She touched his haggard cheeks, hating that dark shadows underscored his sunken eyes, and deep lines drew his wide mouth down—a mouth always so ready to smile. She tried to smooth his tousled black hair. “Be brave, my darling husband.” But in reality, what use was his immense size and strength in the face of death?

With the second way, one has fewer words and you can add a bit more about his character, like the fact that he smiles readily. He would not necessarily see himself like that.

Then there is the other POV problem—head hopping. I know the feeling of wanting to see and feel everything from each characters head, but it makes a reader’s head spin until they are so confused they have no idea who is feeling and saying what.

Stay in one character’s head for at least a page, preferably a chapter or at least until there is a radical day or scene change.

If you really need to go into another character’s head mid-scene, then you need “permission.” Have the character touch some part of their body, preferably the head, like brushing back their hair or rubbing the back of their neck. Then the reader is drawn to that action and their attention is on that character. But this is not ideal. One can always convey how the other character feels with body language.

If you are truly confounded, you can always contact a helpful editor at IFW at IFWeditors@gmail.com for assistance.

GUEST BLOG: Frightening People, Terrifying Places, and Scary Things…

 
by Robert W. Walker
Author of Flesh Wars, Bloodscreams, Abaddon & more

How do we, as authors, get to the level of proficiency that readers send us comments like, “While I read your books, I have to put them out at night—on the porch”, or “I literally threw your book across the room, but crawled over later and finished it”?

That kind of compliment is music to the ears of suspense and horror authors, who are like big kids anxious to frighten our readers; we jump from the pages to shock you. But how do we manage it?

If we can frighten readers through use of our characters, our settings, and our props, then by all means we are turning our people, places, and things to good advantage and full-on use. We get there by means of the useful notion that the devil is in the details. Imagine, if you will, a child’s story—maybe Three Billy Goats Gruff or Charlotte’s Web, for that matter. In the one, we are convinced there is a troll beneath every bridge anxious to eat anything daring to cross it. Then the goat brothers sacrifice one another to the monster . . . creepy!

In the other tale, we have a spider coming to the rescue of a pig, and Charlotte and Wilbur have a full-blown relationship. The characters are fully realized—so much so that they come alive for the mesmerized reader. How can this be?

Details can sell us on any preposterous notion, as in my answer to spontaneous human combustion: creating a creature who smokes people the way we smoke cigarettes in my Flesh Wars books, or my witches in Abaddon who possess a young boy and direct him to become a serial killer. 

The reader is convinced to suspend disbelief through the careful planting of detail atop detail that uses all five senses and sometimes the sixth sense. It requires long and torturous rewrites to fully develop a scary person (antagonist or creature), a scary setting (loco-location), and frightful props (from ax, to cleaver, to Stryker saw).

Naming of names—be it people, places, or props—is also a way to get that fright factor working. Names are scarily specific—like Stryker saw—notice it gets capitalized as names should. The Lincoln Towers underground parking lot becomes even scarier as a modern-day haunted place due to the name, the specific location at Lincoln and Belmont in Chicago. (Notice more caps?) 

It is incumbent upon the modern author to find modern places to haunt, like a museum of modern art after hours, or a trailer park, or a single trailer in that park or … fill in the blank. Locations—and detailed locations at that—win the day when we wish to terrify.

In fact, it is true of any good writing that we want to be specific—all good writing is detailed to the nth degree; it is thesaurus-ing a mood, a point, a feeling, a wound, or a bleed out. We cannot get away with simply saying “it was hot” or “it was cold”—not by a long stretch—as we need to use every word possible that comes with heat (hot, searingly so), which must include sweltering, sweat, perspiration, and boiling, as well. For cold, we need to muster all the words at our command that show frigid, icy, ice-pick-shaped crystals beneath the nails painted with acrylic chartreuse, as in a fun house for my PSI Blue and Deja Blue.

So if there is a secret to scary writing, can it be that simple? Yes, it can, and yes, it is. As Stephen King puts it, “If you can’t legitimately scare the reader, go then for the gross out.” But even the gross out requires great attention to DETAIL.

About Robert Walker:

Award-winning author and graduate of Northwestern University, ROBERT W. WALKER created his highly acclaimed INSTINCT and EDGE SERIES between 1982 and 2005. Rob since then has penned his award-winning historical series featuring Inspector Alastair Ransom with CITY FOR RANSOM (2006), SHADOWS IN THE WHITE CITY (2007), and CITY OF THE ABSENT (2008), and most recently placed Ransom on board the Titanic in a hybrid historical/science fiction epic entitled Titanic 2012 – Curse of RMS Titanic. Rob’s next book, DEAD ON, is a PI revenge tale and a noir set in modern day Atlanta. More recently he has written Bismarck 2013, a historical horror title, The Edge of Instinct, the 12th Instinct Series, and a short story collection entitled Thriller Party of 8 – the one that got away. Rob’s historical suspense CHILDREN of SALEM, while a historical romance and suspense novel, exposes the violent nature of mankind via the politics of witchcraft in grim 1692 New England, a title that some say only Robert Walker could craft—romance amid the infamous witch trials. Robert currently resides in Charleston, West Virginia with his wife, children, pets, all somehow normal. For more on Rob’s published works, see www.RobertWalkerbooks.com, www.HarperCollins.com, or www.amazon.com/kindle books. He maintains a presence on Facebook and Twitter as well.

If you want to check out the titles mentioned in this blog, here are the links:

Flesh Wars 1
Abaddon
PSI Blue
Deja Blue

Constructing a Story Part 1: Frankenstein

by
Charlotte Firbank-King

Like any journey one undertakes, planning is needed. Writing a book is no different. It’s a journey, a long one that will have you excited, frustrated and, at times, exhausted. Most writers have a story budding in their heads. If you’re like me, the stories rattling around in your brain can drive you nuts. I often just write these ideas and relegate them to a file where they may never see the light of day. Others won’t go away and I’m compelled to start. 

See your story as a body.

You are God in the story. You say which characters do what, how they look, how they act, what they love or hate, you control them all—not. Believe me, characters love to take control.

Back to the story. 

First you have a skeleton or even just a partial skeleton. Once you start writing, other ideas grow, then we add some of the organs, veins and arteries. At last we create a heart and brain, then cover it in skin. Well pleased with our efforts, we step back and decide it’s time for the first edit. However, some writers are so confident they decide it’s great as it is—well, maybe one quick edit—and then rush it off to a publisher they just know awaits their brilliant novel. 

You’re confident this is a bestseller. You pop the champagne and relax while you wait for the letter telling you that you are the world’s next great author. You’ve even spent the millions that will roll in. And what about the movie rights? Have to pick a suitable big star for the leading roll. Actually, throw in a few big names. Life is good while you think of a sequel.

Shock and horror, a rejection letter. 

Now you’re in denial. They’re nuts! Right? No problem, another publisher will recognize your brilliance. A hundred rejections later you realize they can’t all be wrong. Maybe an editor will tell you what the answer is—the publishers all tell you to get an editor. 

Not entirely flattened, you send it to some editors. They each send a quote and blow your socks off—what? The editors tell you there are plot flaws—actually the plot is horrific, non-existent—the story doesn’t flow—then you’re telling instead of showing—your characters lack soul—your story has no heart and there are too many back flashes—there’s not enough atmosphere or you aren’t grounding the reader—the grammar sucks—too many adjectives and adverbs—the list is endless. Now you definitely feel demoralized and demolished—brutalized, actually.

Read the story through the eyes of the publisher and editor—read it aloud.

Oh, my God, you have a Frankenstein! The brain is where the bowels should be, the heart is lurking in the anus—the eyes are misplaced and the mouth dominates the face. The nose is in the back of the head, and the feet are where the hands should be, in fact, a hand is missing. The bladder is gone, along with the stomach. Even you can see this thing is a horror story.

What went wrong?

You didn’t plan your body before you started creating it! Then you didn’t edit, edit, edit and edit more. The less you edit the higher the editor’s quote.

I don’t say you mustn’t just jump in and write like demon, but at least be aware that there will be problems, and your first body (draft) will need a major operation.

The first draft always sucks. Give yourself a break, a couple of weeks to lick your wounds, then dust yourself off and jump in.

Take on board every criticism you get—don’t listen too closely to family and friends unless they’re hard-core editors that love you enough to be honest. 

Next week’s blog will be on how to construct the “body.”

Concoctastory

by
Charlotte Firbank-King
 
Concoctastory 

(Bet that had you running to the dictionary.)

This is how we “concoctastory.” Open a file called Story Outline.

First thing:

In the actual manuscript:

Under “Chapter 1,” I put in the era or year and location of the story in italics. It just grounds the reader, lets them know where they are. But that’s me and it isn’t imperative.

In the Story Outline file:

Put in the date you start the story, for your own interest. 

Give a brief outline of the story for your own benefit, but this will probably change dramatically. 

Next headings:

1) Names and details:

In the View tool, I tick the Navigation Pane, then go to the Paragraph tool under General, find Outline Level, and click on the down arrow—it will open up options. I always use Level 1 for chapter heading in the manuscript and various headings in the Story Outline for easy access. The first heading would be Brief Synopsis. Be sure to change it back to Body Text in the paragraph tool before going to the next line, or you’ll have a million headings.

Name of hero and heroine—hair and eye color, height, build, defining features, age marks, scars, deformities, habits, twitches, tastes, occupation, likes, dislikes, traits—good and bad—ambitions, goals, obsessions, status in society, domicile, marital status, siblings, parents, etc.

In fact, anything you may need to remember as the story unfolds. Many of these details will change as time goes on, but the physical traits will probably remain the same. 

If you name specific details about buildings, furniture, or other setting items, list them here.  If they are mentioned again, you don’t want a purple building or chair to be pink later in the story.

As you write, add each character’s name and physical appearance. One may start off with a cast of characters, but the story may need a new character. It’s all too easy to forget that Joe had cerulean blue eyes. One often errs and gives characters brown or green eyes later in the book.

Minor characters, like a barmaid or footman, don’t need a name if they only make one or two appearances. In fact, it’s better to keep names to a minimum. Only add a description if you gave them a specific thing like eye or hair color, a squint or limp favoring the left leg—you don’t want them favoring the right leg at another point.

The names of ships, streets, buildings and places must also go into this file as they crop up in the story.

Make a note of things like Elvis borrowed $50,000 from Danny the hobo. Or he gave Leonardo da Vinci a $1 tip for opening his chariot door.

Be careful to keep names varied—don’t have Joe in love, working with or related to Jasmine, or worse, Josephine.

2) List of possible names:

Make a list of cool names for male and female people, dogs, cats, horses or any animal names. I make a habit of putting the list in alphabetical order and use only one letter per memorable character—lesser characters aren’t important, unless their relationship is too close to the character they interact with.

3) Publishing details:

The author bio, query, synopsis, letters for agents/publishers, plus back cover blurb and tagline. Or you can put them in a new file, then make a folder with the book title.

4) Background info:

Almost all stories need research. Put the books used or where you found it on the Internet or the person who gave you the info. You may need to go back and check something. I have a separate file with all research relating to that story, then put it in the folder mentioned above if I copy and paste from the Internet. 

You would be amazed at how many ideas come to you as you research.

Writing needs preparation like anything in life. There is only one problem: a story can take on a life of its own and change direction—just go with the flow, be sure to change things in the Story Outline if you alter something. 

Above all, let the creative juices flow and enjoy the ride.

Tying Up Loose Ends

by Jessica Nelson
I woke up the other morning with an irresistible urge to watch Disney’s Beauty and the Beast. So I did.
 

I’m sitting there on the couch, singing along blissfully to one of my favorite animated movies, when I reach this scene. If you are a marketer then you can also read about 3d animation as it is a cost effective method.Well, do you need 3d rendering for your next project? hop over here.

Look familiar? If you can’t place it, it’s from the beginning of the song “Great Wide Somewhere,” right after Gaston proposes marriage to Belle.
I get to this scene, and the most seemingly random thought strikes me that I haven’t been able to shake ever since.
What ever happened to those farm animals?
Who took care of them while Belle was with the Beast, and Maurice was lost in the woods? When Belle and her father moved into the castle, did they sell the farm or bring their goats and chickens with them?
Like I said, seemingly random and probably unimportant—unless you’re a writer. Those animals are a loose end, an unresolved conflict. An astute reader—or in this case, viewer—will get to the end of the book and wonder about all those loose ends.
In writing, every word, every event, every character—even nameless farm animals—must somehow move the story forward. In this scene, are the animals necessary? They give Belle an audience for her lyrical ranting, but other than that, they serve no purpose—and they create a loose end.
We tend to add things to scenes to dress them up. Things that, at the time, make sense. However, we need to be careful we’re not accidentally adding a subplot that we have no intention of coming back to. When everything is said and done, and our precious paper-baby is all ready to go out into the world, we need to re-read every scene and make sure that everything in it serves a purpose and every conflict introduced is resolved.
Did you write a spy novel in which your character had to steal top-secret files for the CIA, then was chased all over the world before he finally realized he wanted nothing more than a quiet family life with the Arabian beauty who helped him allude the Russians out to kill him? Great! I’d love to read it. But one question: what happened to the files? Did he ever turn them in to his supervisor?
Did you open your paranormal romance with a girl walking home from a birthday celebration at a nightclub with her best friends before she was attacked by vampires? Again, I’d love to read it. But what about the best friends? Do they ever call her? Stop by her place to make sure she’s okay? Call the police when a week passes and no one has seen hide nor hair of her? If they don’t do any of those things, 1.) they are poor excuses for best friends, and 2.) they are a loose end.
If you’re feeling tangled up in loose ends, an editor is a wonderful ally to help you get untangled and tie your loose ends in perfect little bows.
 
 
Beauty and the Beast is an original Disney film. All characters from the movie belong to Disney. The image used was taken from Google Images.